Random Words of Kindness

We have all heard heart warming stories of people paying for someones meals or leaving an insanely large tip but the reality is that most of us don't have the finances to do big things even though we may want to. One thing that I have been on the receiving end of are kind words and I have to admit, it takes balls to walk up to a stranger and say something even if it is nice. I was having a "blah" kind of day. It wasn't particularly bad but it wasn't that great either. My husband and I, along with our 5 kids had just been to my Grandmothers Birthday party and on our way home my husband had to stop by someone's house to pick up a piece of equipment. (Thank you Craigslist for making it possible for him to find an EFX machine at a price normal humans can afford). So, while he was inside checking stuff out and then loading it up into a truck I was in the car with all of the kids. They weren't screaming like banshees or anything but it was a long time to sit in a car trying to entertain 6, 5, 3, 2 year olds and an infant who happened to fill her diaper just before we were getting ready to head out. Since it was getting late we decided to hit a burger joint to grab some food. If you have small kids you probably just inhaled sharply or maybe winced a bit. It is concerning trying to handle 5 kids with food and drink at a fast food joint that does not have play sets...its intimidating picturing sitting there with a fussy baby in one arm while trying to strong arm the 2 year old with the other all while your fries go cold and limp while the scent of their salty goodness hangs in the air. But we needed food and waiting to get home wasn't in the cards. So we pull in, unload the crew and find a place that will fit our little munchkins and three adults. We sat in those areas where half of those at the table are in a booth and the other side is lined with chairs...so my 2 and 3 year old kids proceeded to stand in the booth, looking and pointing, not using terribly quite voices. I remember feeling stressed. I remember thinking that there was no way I'd be eating because I'd either be too busy feeding and corralling my kids and/or I'd be too stressed to eat anything. Every sound was magnified. Every movement was watched like they were near the edge of a cliff. I was so worried that I would disturb the other patrons or the staff...and then, this woman walked over to our table, her voice happy, her face bright and smiling. She said to me "I just wanted to tell you that you have a beautiful family. Your kids are wonderful. I'll let you get back to your meal, but I just had to tell you!" I managed to choke out a "Thank you." I was so caught off guard and if it weren't for the fact that she smiled and said "you're welcome" as she walked out of the restaurant I would have thought I hadn't spoken loud enough.

I was stunned. My kids are awesome? I mean, I KNOW they are awesome, but they were being awesome in here? Their constant standing and loud laughter didn't bother this woman? To be honest, it wasn't the first time my kids have been complimented in this way-but it wasn't as surprising when it came from a table of older ladies, or from a couple that were obviously grandparents. At church people have told me my kids were "well-behaved" and a visiting priest once told my husband that he hadn't heard a peep out of the kids, and had he not seen them, he wouldn't have known they were there. But to hear it from a random woman, alone who did not appear to me to be any older than perhaps her early to mid 30's and in a place that isn't a location you expect kids to be quiet...it felt very much like a smack in the back of the head for me...to make me wake up and realize that I have great kids. That I am a good Mom. Do my kids get loud occasionally? Have they accidentally spilled a three fourths of the way full cup of hot chocolate on a carpet in the women's section at Target? For sure. They aren't robots, but I guess the surprising part, the part that makes Old ladies, priests and random women feel compelled to walk up to me and compliment my kids is that I TRY. I don't let them get away with being little hellions. Is it easy to sit there and repeat the same thing over and over again while my Western Bacon Cheeseburger gets cold and the ice in my soda melts? No its not. But that woman, and those others before her, made me feel amazing. It made me feel like even though I think there is work to be done on my end, my kids are not the kind that make everyone else want to walk away. So thank you random Woman and to all those sweet seniors who have stopped me and pulled me out of my stupor. And to those of you who are out and about, take the time to notice the well behaved kids-not just the ones screaming at the top of their lungs that they want a Barbie. Notice them and maybe, if the woman pushing the stroller or cart looks uneasy, take 30 seconds and tell her she's doing a great job. Tell her she has a beautiful family. Those 30 seconds and simple words will go a long way for that Mom. It will help her get thru the rest of her day-maybe even the rest of the week.